on the road again.

Note: a draft of this post has been sitting untouched on the Mac for about 10 days. Guess I've been busy adjusting or something...

Well folks, we Steeds have done it again.

We've moved to a new home for a new chapter in the story of our family. We're here in northern OH (so far north that crossing the border into Michigan can happen in a matter of minutes), and dear Drake will begin 2 years of post-doctorate training at the University of Toledo Medical Center (UTMC for short).

We found a cute house that we're hopeful will fit our family's needs well, particularly our need for Drake to walk/bike to work as we're a one-car family. This house happens to be only a handful of blocks away from the hospital, in a great neighborhood, and also on a much busier street than we once had. But really, it's a very cute house that we're renting, and we do hope you'll come visit!

And if I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times...moving is for crazy people. Truly, it must only be the clinically insane who take on moving, particularly moving with several small ones underfoot. So that's why we did it in the summer of 2014, again in the summer of 2015, and plan to do it yet again in the fall of 2017. Oh, and we had 3 moves prior to those, but I won't bore you with the dates and details.

I need to go take a nap now.

Honestly though, we had tremendous help on both ends. In Dayton I had friends offering left and right to help in all sorts of ways -- play dates at their homes for my kids, watching my kids at the park, a dear friend calling to say she had packed us a big box of snacks for the road, another taking many of my shifts at VBS so that I could sneak home and pack. On the night we packed the truck we had 17 people at our house ready and willing to haul boxes, watch the little ones, clean, and do anything we needed.

I had this little lady in tow, of course...

And do you have ANY idea how nearly impossible it was to focus on packing boxes when a baby THIS CUTE was beckoning ever so adorably from her car seat? It really was just unfair that I would be expected to put our every possession in a box when all I really had any interest in doing was smooching this gorgeous face.

Anyway...

All of our belongings (children included) did make it to our new home, so apparently some amount of packing was accomplished, no matter how begrudgingly.

We then had great help on this end of the move as well and are now slowly but surely putting our home into working order. I think everyone even has a pair of clean underwear awaiting them in their respective drawer tomorrow! Things must really be coming along.

It's great, too, to have Drake home for a few weeks before he starts at UTMC. It's giving us a chance to divide and conquer, to exhale a bit from a whirlwind of a year, and to start establishing old and new routines. I guess that's a blessing about moving -- the feeling of a clean slate.

But I tell ya, it's hard to leave. Starting over stinks.

We were finally reaching the point in Dayton that we felt part of things...we had established a good rhythm, we knew many families, we had friends we could call for play dates and family get-togethers. There's a comfort in what's familiar, amiright? And honestly, the Catholic homeschooling community there is second to none. What an unbelievable (and large!) group of families. It was amazing. Our year there was action packed, and we had the constant support of that group.

And I'm really missing it. In some ways it feels confusing that we were only part of something so ideal for our family for one year. One year...only to be transplanted yet again. I know, I know, we knew ahead of time that our stay would be short...but I don't think we expected it to be so fantastic. And that's the way it works with me and our Lord sometimes -- things happening much differently than I anticipated.

I'm hopeful about our time here, but I'd be lying if I said I'm feeling great about it. Admittedly I don't feel great about it. I'm trying to open myself to the possibilities here, to what the Lord has in mind for Steeds in Toledo. I'm grieving what we left, missing friends, somewhat unmotivated to tackle the remaining boxes. I'm tired of being new, humbled by needing a GPS even just to get to the gas station, exasperated by the parish-hopping we're still doing. And don't even ask what our homeschool year will look like because, well, just don't. We'll get there eventually. September 8 to be exact.

I don't want to paint a bleak picture here -- it hasn't been all bad, and we've met a number of families in our 2 short weeks here. We've had play dates, family adoration, made unexpected connections, and are getting what we hope will be a solid school year together for the kids. We've taken some day trips that included hiking along a peninsula on Lake Erie, took a canal boat ride pulled by mules, saw Canada across the Detroit River, and plan to see a baseball game this weekend. We are incredibly blessed.

And for the record, taking a family selfie with wiggly children is no small task.

So pray for me, would you? And visit!

The Mister.

You know who I love the most? This guy:

Drake and I recently celebrated 7 years of wedded bliss. And truly, when I look back on our married life to date, I am filled with gratitude for the great gift of sharing life with him. We have known the grad school life for the majority of our marriage as he is about to complete the fifth (and final...can you believe it?) year of his doctorate, so it's odd to us to think that this is actually not how most families start out. But as I've mentioned before, we're not big on conforming to standards and things so we figured, heck, why not take on a full-time doctorate, have 4 kids, move several times, homeschool, and everything in between?

So we did. Thanks to a novena we prayed to St. Joseph who really opened my heart to the possibility.

And now, here we are...me, a happy mama to 4 gorgeous babies and Drake, a doctor of psychology and husband/father extraordinaire.

Now don't be fooled. It hasn't been a cakewalk. And it still isn't. In fact, it's often taken an intentional act of the will to say 'yes' to our Lord and to one another while every emotion inside us is screaming, 'Nooooooo!' And sometimes the little ones around us are actually physically screaming which makes it all the more infuriating sanctifying.

I remember Drake telling me during an especially difficult time in the program that students pursuing this are most likely to drop out during the first or fourth year as those are just uniquely arduous. We were both really feeling the burn of the program during that fourth year, and when I heard that students have been known to drop out even after being over halfway done, I believed it. I also thought it meant that Drake would need to spend even more time away. But you know, I married a good one, and it was during that year that he suggested a weekly date night out for us.

This was big.

In fact, I'd say it was a turning point in our marriage, and I never expected it to come in the midst of academic craziness when the stakes were so high and internship right around the corner. Doing this required a few things:

1. Babysitting from a very willing and wonderful grandma who lived 10 minutes away.

2. Creativity to do this on the cheap.

3. Clearing our schedules.

That third little item was the kicker and is what has made all the difference: simply taking time for one another and for nothing else. Having this weekly date night is something we build our schedules around, rather than the other way around...only taking time to spend together when time and energy fall into our laps. We prioritize one another, and we're all the better for it. It's what we promised in front of our family, our friends, and our God 7 short years ago.

And really, doing it this way makes so much more sense, doesn't it? Since when did to-do's (which are never-ending for our family) become more important than people? And what were we even doing on that altar but promising to devote our lives to helping get the other to Heaven? That's something that simply cannot happen without great effort and intention. And our weekly dates are part of that. Since we've moved away from grandparents and we have yet to find a money tree to support us in grad school, our dates are often quite simple and in the quiet of our own home rather than out somewhere. But there's beauty in the simplicity, and it helps us appreciate the times out together...like the time we stumbled upon a rodeo. Yep. You read that right. A real-live rodeo, complete with bulls, cowboys, and stench. But that's a bit beside the point.

I'm gonna let you in on a little secret...

Ready?

We often take more than one night a week for one another.

I know. Crazy, but true. In true Steed fashion.


These frequent date nights often mean that dishes don't get washed that night and are waiting in the morning. Sometimes it means that the floor is unswept when we head to bed or that the laundry-folding must wait until later in the week. On occasion the bills wait until the next day or the garbage gets taken out the following morning rather than the night before. But it is always worth it. Always.

Drake, my love, here's to many more 'adult drinks' on the front porch, singing in the living room, bowls of popcorn, discussions of philosophy, and episodes of LOST.

I love you!

Littles.

I'm going to share with you 4 of my favorite things: little Steeds. I'm crazy about them.

Thomas Michael

'She is THE CUTEST baby in the world!' -TS, age 6
You heard it here first, folks.

Hold on, is that muscle tone there?

Shares his mama's sweet tooth...

I'm not sure when Thomas went from being a little kid to being a boy, but I sure do wish he had warned me about the transformation beforehand. All of our kids have grown a lot this year in all sorts of ways, but it's been especially striking in Thomas. He continues to amaze us with his creativity, sense of humor, love of reading and being read to, and ability to build friendships with children of all ages. He has made incredible progress academically as well as in the pool and took a mere hour to learn how to ride a bike. He's now gone on several long bike rides with Daddy, loves throwing rocks in the river, and can quote most any book he's heard. Oh, and he prepares lunch for his siblings and mama on occasion. Bonus!

Maria Thérèse

Elated to have a sister!

An early morning selfie

Soaked!

Maria continues to astound us with both her maternal ways and ahem, vibrant personality. She really has been a firecracker since the very beginning and quite often doesn't even realize how loudly she's speaking! But this pretty lady has become such a devoted sister and friend even at the young age of 4 years old. Her fine motor skills have improved tremendously this year, and she now loves to color and paint. She actually initiated learning to read, so we got a head start on that this year. She, too, is quite the little fish in the water and also loves to sing, dance, read, climb trees, play dollies, and take charge in the play room. 

Dominic Ambrose

Yep, that about sums it up.

Road trip!

He's all boy, this one.

Dominic is very two and very boy. The combination often results in an exciting mix of energy, dirt (or sand, as the case may be), and mischief. He takes after his brother, and most boys for that matter, in his affinity for al things with wheels and engines. He loves the rock wall at the park, Legos in the play room (especially when the older ones are busy with something else), and books on the couch. He's become a bit choosy about his wardrobe selection, but we Steeds pick our battles. 

Cecilia Elizabeth

Well, hello there!

It really is impossible not to smooch her.

Still a bit unsure about girly headbands.

Cecilia is about as sweet as newborns come. Every morning greets her with vying sibling lips as they all duke it out over who gets to kiss her first, hold her first, unwrap her swaddle, and pick out her clothes. She's been nursing like a champ from the get-go, has started smiling, and will even tolerate tummy time for short periods at a time. We absolutely felt the love in our home multiply when she was born. I honestly can hardly remember life before her arrival, and it's not because of sleep deprivation. In fact, she's been our best newborn sleeper so far. But now that I've made that public, I'd better cue up the coffee maker as I may have just jinxed the whole thing.

I think it's clear why little Steeds are right up there on my favorites list. I'll be posting on their Daddy soon, too, and why putting our marriage first has been the best thing for us and for our small herd. 

Is That Okay by You?

I've done a lot of people-pleasing in my day. You know, the usual stuff. Doing things so that others will take notice, not doing things for fear of what others might think. Watering down what needs to be said more firmly. I've actually been at this for about 30 years, so I've become quite the expert in the areas of pride, vanity, and self-admiration.

Sad, but true.

I go back and forth about blogging all the gosh darn time, and when it comes down to it I've found 2 things to be true about publicly posting anything: I always enjoy writing, and I always worry about what others are thinking of me after reading a post. Always. Without exception. I let you make me paranoid, dear reader. Sometimes that 'publish' button has a lot of power over me.

But what exactly is the purpose of blogging? For some, blogging pays the bills. For others, blogging is a way to connect with others. Blogging can be a way to keep an electronic version of family updates, accessible to friends near and far. And for some, blogging is simply a place to write -- nothing more, nothing less, take it or leave it.

The latter is what I aspire to. I'm not looking to earn money from it, nice as that might be. If connection happens by happy circumstance as a result of something I post, then that's bonus, and I do hope you'll fill the combox with whatever comes to mind. I'm not using this blog solely to post family updates, though those will be scattered throughout.  Maybe you think I should set my sights higher, but alas, I'm trying to let this blog serve me, not I serve the blog. And if you're unhappy, dear reader, I think it will take you a full .01 seconds to move on to another blog. Sorrynotsorry.

I worry that my writing doesn't measure up to the Jens, Bonnies, and Jennys of the blogosphere (read: it doesn't). Mom blogs are all. over. the web, and I worry that people won't want to have a real-life conversation with me because 'they've already read that in my blog.' That has actually been said to me before while sharing a meal with a friend. I worry that people won't check in with me anymore because of a similar reason...that I've said anything I might have to share in my blog already so we'll just carry on as usual. I worry that I'm not tech-savvy enough, though technology has never thrilled me in the slightest.

Here's the rub: this is a blog. It gives a glimpse into something that's been on my mind, something I need to process, or something I want to share. It's a place for me to write. It's not the entirety of who I am, and I hope that I can write in this space while still having very genuine, in person/phone friendships with you, whether you're near or far. I hope we can share our differences, here or in person. I hope we can have logical conversation in a spirit of openness and understanding. You might read things here that you agree with wholeheartedly, and you might question the truth of other things that I post. That's okay by me, and maybe it's agreeable to you, too.

And now that we've established some common ground, I feel a bit more free to post here. Click on over if you so choose! Heck, you might just be privy to some recent photos of little Steeds in an upcoming post...in between bouts of packing, of course!